(... look, I can't help it... in another age people would have hailed me as a genius.)
Person 1: I say old chap, these nuts make me sneeze!
Person 2 (who fortunately asks just the right question): Well, well! Why's that, Neutron me old mate?
Person 1 (...yeah, ok... me): Because they're C-ashoo nuts!
... oh, please yourselves...