Never Have a Back

I have moaned about this before (here for example) ...but it's my back you see - well, actually it's not even my back. It seems to be the result of the sciatic nerve in my back causing trouble elsewhere - referred pain they call it ...in this case in my Tibialis anterior or more specifically the peroneal nerve.

If you have had lumbago you will know about shooting pains and this, whatever it is, is a cute variation on that. The only vague warning sign is a dull aching sensation just to the right of the bottom of my spine ...and then suddenly there is a flash and I am hopping around the room releasing a stream of invective containing a lot of 'f' words and no shortage of 'b' words. The feeling is as if some invisible presence has taken an invisible 6" nail and hammered it, with great force, right into the muscle at the top of my shin (Tibialis anterior); then this evil demon proceeds to heat the nail to excruciating temperatures ...and sometimes there is the added agony of something like a zappy electric charge being switched rapidly on and off at the point where the 'nail' has been hammered in. These attacks probably only last 20 seconds but they leave me in a sweaty heap afterwards.

That is normally the sign that I should have taken a painkiller half an hour before...

What fun!

(Illustration: http://www.instantanatomy.net/leg/muscles/tibia.html)

Century Up!

Well, it would have been my dad's centenary today - he was born on 26th January 1908. It's almost scary to think what has changed in that short space of time from then to now.

They had:

no phones
no cars
no planes
no radio
no tele
no supermarkets
no penicillin
no computers
no Internet...

Mind you, when you look at the photo, which was taken in 1987 about 6 months before he died, and you see how much he loved his grandchildren (in this picture, Biddy) then you realise maybe all that stuff is not as important as we think.

Happy Birthday Jimmy!

So, I managed to get the right moment to take the picture! "Life Bites" Kabel 1.

Jimmy was 16 on Friday and we are celebrating today with a Schweinebraten and Knödel.



So congratulations for the birthday, the TV appearance and the choice of dinner!

Bloody Flash

On Sunday at 9.30 my older son's TV series started on Kabel 1 in deepest Bavaria. I set the alarm as I got in late from a gig on Saturday. Up, blearily, at 9.20, I grabbed the camera to record this moment. We knew he doesn't actually feature in the first episode but he is in the opening titles.

I tried a couple of test photos to make sure it looked ok...and I think, I think I may have reset the flash setting... the titles rolled, unknown faces flashed past, and then...there he was in action...I pressed the shutter and the STUPID BLOODY CAMERA started that never ending flash process which one particular setting makes it go through to stop people having red eyes or some such codswallop ...zzzzick...bzzzz...agada...agada...aha...aha...Ferrrr-LASH!

In the milliseconds that took the titles had moved on to some more unknown faces...

So what you see here are the titles 2 milliseconds too late...

I Am Become Smoke-free

Since January 1st Deepest Bavaria has had a smoking ban in its pubs. I played my first gig under these new conditions last night... and it was fabulous!

Just stale air to breath in - not smoky stale air.

Normally by midnight I would be starting to get a blocked nose and a sore throat but not last night.

I realised, though, how used I am to the old way when I got home. I was firmly convinced that I was totally drenched in smoke as usual and must stink of it. I had the feeling I could even smell it on my clothes and skin and I had to keep sniffing my shirt for proof that I didn't - just good old washing powder.

And each time I sniffed I would say, "Wow! Amazing!! I just don't smell of smoke. Incredible!!"

Now too, the morning after, I expect to smell that stale smoke smell on my hair... nothing! Brilliant.

Smoke-freedom!

(little later...)

I was just letting my mind wander around subject of smoking in public places when I recalled that people used to smoke in cinemas! It's hard to believe these days but I recall as a teenager watching many a film through a haze of blue smoke. Then in the 70s they introduced the semi-ludicrous idea of only allowing smoking in the seats on the right of the cinema auditorium. So you would sit to the left and watch a cloud of cigarette smoke rise from the right-hand side of the cinema and slowly spread upward and then across to the non-smokers.

But you couldn't beat the cinemas in Greece in the mid 70s. There each film had to have an intermission because after half an hour you couldn't see the screen any more. And while everyone went out into the foyer, two or three young lads would walk down the aisles and spray water into the air to try and clear the smoke away!

Happy New Year!

Welcome to 2008.

I don't know why but since I woke this 'morning' I have been thinking of these awful 'jokes'.

(WARNING: What follows goes from bad through extremely bad to health threatening!)

What do you say:

to a rabbit?

Hoppy New Year!

to a beer drinker?

Happy New Beer!

to Michael Flatley?

Tappy New Year!

to a baby?

Nappy New Year!

to an atomic physisist?

Happy Nuclear!

to a gift shop owner?

Happy Souvenir!

to an angel?

Harpy New Year!

to a Flower Power follower?

Hippy New Year!

to a cobbler?

Happy Shoe Year!

to a Star Trek weapons expert?

Zappy New Year!

...feel free to contribute your own...